anecdote: 302: Baritone

the senior backed me against the fridge

when I said wha?
he shoved his tongue
down my throat,
stopped
patted my head
said, niiiice
in his baritone
wandered off smiling.
I sputtered at colleagues
who said I must have misunderstood.

anecdote # 301: E

His lowered gaze:  "the Bible says to forgive
so I do"

he paused

then a sharp glare
"but I don't forget"

(at 14 I felt he got forgiveness wrong.
compassion as equal — key.)

he enters dementia.
their reciprocal grudges remain.

tribute #289: tattooed bear

In university I went downtown.
got turned around.

Anyone I asked said no change, sorry
or turned suited shoulders away.

Outside Living Colour
big ole tattooed dudes smoked.

Taller asked what I was looking for,
directed tenderly as a father.

anecdote: #300 - neighbour

we've talked dozens of times.
she's in a constant dreadful fret.
I presumed it was her nature.

what if associations with me
call up all her anxiety.
automatically worst words come.

she's trying to drive me off.
it's finally working.

tribute: #288 - Pete

I presumed we were clicking.
He wasn't leaving.
Laughed at my joke
added to it.
instead of backing away.

He'd be a good role model.
There to dance, conversationally.
No promises or implications
doing figure 8s
around my straight-kneed stammer.

tribute #287 - Mrs. Martin

bless her, she hired me
with doubts intact.

all my answers were:
yes, I can. laundry?
ironing? cleaning?

I'd never touched
an iron or machine.

I burned straight thru
her nightgown.

she knew: everyone's got to
have a start sometime.

anecdote #299 - boys

in the parking lot
at the feed mill
two skateboarders
yelled, "old man"
at my father. he
gripped the wheel
shook from the hands
through all of him
tore off on foot
after them as
they laughed.
do they recall?

collective #91 - general public

broadcasting by blogs, photos, social media
situates interactions in cold interstitial space
not intimate, connected, compassionate hover.

why should they surprise me with failures
to engage, indifferent remarks? we aren't
allies, never were. offer energy to tribe instead.

wherever they may be.

anecdote #298 - S

goodbyes aren't always coded clearly.
when she strained, emphatic: how I'd
always matter, she'd always support me.
mute, didn't know what to make of it.

that was goodbye. that was her final
letting go, not the holding on it seemed.

anecdote #297 - the old neighbours

heard emotional meltdowns
volume-cranked articulate insecurities

her husband's walk to cool off,
read each walk as quieter version of,

shale sheared from the ideal of her
wider range. they won't implode.

"such displays" — my prudence.
managing best they can, too.

anecdote #296 - C

ah, look in there. heart fists
cramps. competitive. bitter.
earnest need to beat her

at scrabble. means something
more when it's her. grudge.
is she iconic of a group?

what's that about heart?
ego, identity seems pinned
tight for win.

tribute # 286: Talus Taylor

Barbapapa, innocent safe.
He and Tison made a world
of constant picnics, riverside
community, painting and play
becoming whatever you wanted
as a lark. be a lark, a fish, a boat.
joyful interactions. face value, this.
messages of protecting good.

anecdote #295 -CanDoA

newbie, utter new to idea
of writing but on fire.
can you do anything?

even open heart surgery?
yes (she must assures herself
libraries must have a book)

I've had students with
decades more skill and
education, but they quail.

collective #90 - quiet ones

need to retune attention towards quiet ones
who don't click
as if forcing mismatched jigsaw pieces

not seeking to close on my usefulness,
open palmed, they could take or
leave me.

quiet, not self-divulging but
solid, cautious to draw out.

anecdote #294 - hygienist (1990s)

my jaws open for longer,
wider than ever. then
the way she asked if I
would want lip balm.

how she smoothed it on
the sympathy of her face.
was I ashen, shaking?
a wave of compassion
energy, almost visible.

anecdote #293 - craft person

still carrying her
how she tore into me
plaintive about how I was
stealing food from her mouth
by documenting the fair I organized
by photographing a room her crafts were in.
I can't let crazy people rule my future.